The Smart Bride: Know Your Wedding Values, Vision + Priorities
Monday, January 10, 2011
Last Tuesday, nashvillebrideguide.com hosted our first annual wedding planning workshop, The Smart Bride. All would agree that it was very informative and a must-have session for every Nashville bride. Designed as a vehicle for couples/families to get smart before they started making costly wedding planning mistakes, it also helped couples develop a solid foundation based on a list of their unique values.
event photos courtesy of jHenderson Studios
You really need to attend the workshop if you are located in Nashville. But, for those unable to attend (like our blog readers from NY to FL), here are some of the night's highlights:
How does pre-marriage education help couples keep their sanity, develop values and a vision?
Marie - Nashville Marriage Studio
- You can become overloaded with tons of wedding info. Counseling grounds the couple, helps them communicate through the entire process.
- Jot down 2-3 things that distress both of you - i.e. spa visits, pedicures, reading a book. When you get overwhelmed, refer to that list. Make sure you take care of you (one another) during the process.
- A great business book to read that can apply to wedding planning is "Start with the Why"
- 3 questions we need to be asking:
1. Why? (Values)
2. How? (Vision)
3. What? What do you picture on your wedding day? What are the actual steps to take to achieve that picture?
- Couple Values - Reflect on why you are getting married? Why are you have a ceremony? Why are you having a reception? Why are we doing this and what is important to us?
- It is always good to write out the values and come back to visit them early and often!
- Vision - how does your vision come to life? If you close your eyes, what picture do you see, who is there?
Marie + Sarah (left), Ashley (right)
What did/do you value and how did those value impact their wedding/wedding plans.
Natasha - Newlywed, blogger at Big Spoon, Little Spoon
- Begin looking at wedding priorities - what are the main values throughout the wedding?
- Mine was financial peace, we bargain shopped together and made sure to gather as much info as early as possible.
Krista - Newlywed, blogger at Becoming Mrs. Dial
- Values: personal stamp was our biggest focus. We were able to figure that out talking about the core values that were important early on in the planning process. We attended a session with Ashley, Marie at The Unabridged Bride last year and it really helped us focus.
Hillary - Brocade Design + 2011 bride
- Hillary shared her story of why talking about the values early is important in the planning process. She and her fiancé were three months into the planning process when they sat down and evaluated what truly mattered. They realized what they truly wanted was a stress free relaxing day, so they are now getting married in Hawaii in June!
Natosha + Krista (front), Hillary (back)
How do you translate vision/style into your wedding?
Sarah G. - Regalo Design
- Style - look at the seasons, weather, colors, etc.
- What makes you feel good naturally? Start there.
- Look at what décor/ style is in your home. Those are clues into your style.
- Real Story: Clients Mallory & Mike had a DIY wedding in Dickson, where they were able to incorporate much of their own home décor into their wedding. We used their home decor elements to decorate each table, reception. It was 100% them. Decor spend was only $400 as a result.
- For inspiration, go to places non-wedding related. Places you and your fiancé enjoy being (building architecture, restaurants for table settings, clothing stores, etc
Ashley adds: A great book to help you put your vision into action is Style Your Dream Wedding
Hillary - Brocade Design: Values
- Always include priorities and rate them by their importance level
- How much does this or that truly mean to you?
- Remember that values are based on needs, not wants
- Ask: What three words do you want to describe your wedding?
- Think: What do you want guests to say about your wedding?
- Imagine: Your wedding is a painting, what’s the landscape for it?
Hillary - Brocade Design: Narrow Down What Your Want
- Have core list and vision in head
- Have a reason. I need this because…
- Create a design anchor and stick with it
- Make a few elements key, rather than everything key. Too many wow factors can become overwhelming and like a circus.
- Have one or two primary colors and then a compliment color
- Think of key elements
- Always use the K.I.S.S method: Keep it Simple Stupid
- Use repetition and reiteration!
Now that you have your vision, values, style - how do you know what to spend where?
Ashley - Don't start with budget/dollars. Start with ranking what's most important to you. We'll get into budget next week but you first need to know what you want before you start dividing the financial pie.
Sarah W. of Music City Events - I advise couples to start with a list of what's important to them. We'll allocate their actual budget after they know what's important. Rank these wedding elements, with 1 being your most important. Have your fiancé + family rank them too. See how your lists compare.
List of Wedding Priorities
Help throughout wedding & marriage planning journey
____ Counseling / Coaching
Dream style, décor and details
____ Décor / styling / lighting
____ Stationery – std, invitations, programs
Amazing experience for us/guests
____ Ceremony venue
____ Reception venue
____ Gifts for bridal party / parents
____ Guest gifts / favors
____ Entertainment (i.e. photo booth)
____ Wait staff – valet, servers, etc
Meaningful to us
____ Bridal Gown
____ Groom’s Attire
____ Ring – His
____ Ring - Hers
____ Unique touches such as ______________________
Sarah W. of Music City Events
Register for next camps - Tues, Jan 11, 18, 25
If you missed last week, there are three more sessions that I strongly recommend that you attend. This Tuesday (Jan 11), we will focus on ways to manage and maximize your wedding budget – from where to find affordable quality vendors (no matter your budget) to how to smart DIY. On Jan 18 and 25, we will give you the info you need to hire wedding specialists – from what to ask to what to know. If there is snow the day of the event, we will postpone to the next Tuesday and alert attendees.
Special thanks to Events@1418 (where we were lucky to have our workshop, but it's also a wedding venue!), A Catered Affair (for the lovely food + Sangria!), Nashville Event Lighting (for providing the mics and sound), McNeal Wedding Films + jHenderson Studios (for chronicling our event), Music City Events (for taking care of ALL of the behind the scene event details + of course our ask-us-anything panel.